Voting: like being able to choose which bullet you'd prefer to be shot in the head with
Evil raccoon
Accident in the mall. I quit.
I'm a nonviolent person until I see a spider
Bad luck Brian has a pet rock
Don't lick the chocolate frogs
For a moment, I couldn't figure out how to leave the bathroom.
Driver's license
Miley Cyrus vs. Unknown man
Thongs
Love letters
Sleeping under the sea